Asians Never Say "No" -- Really?
It is TRUE Asians, especially the Far-Easterners, never
say 'No'.
Well... to most of us...
But don't ever think of taking advantages on this
'opportunity', because it does not work that way.
Because when Asians say 'Yes', it does not always mean
'Yes' either.
No, they are not really lying. They are just saving your
face. According to the culture, being said 'NO' to is very
embarrassing. If an Asian gives you a 'NO', it means they
won't want any more contact with you. And it means he/she
is offending and insulting.
So... how could you get a right answer to your question?
Easy... Just ask the right question.
Be careful not to ask a wrong question -- for example,
if you ask, "can you do that?" , an Asian employee or
partner of yours will always say "Yes" even though he
knows for sure what you've asked is not practical and
the result will be more losses to the business.
This is because (1) He CAN really do what you've asked --
if he says he can't do it, it'll take his pride; and (2)
Telling you your order is not quite right will embarrass
you (according to the way he thinks). When he says yes, he
is saving the faces of both you and himself.
For Asians who have been involving in International business
for a long time, they could be different. But do you want to
take a chance?
What you can do to prevent this misunderstanding is to
rephrase your question a bit. Do not use a yes-no question.
You can ask, "What if we...", or "Is it possible
for us
to...", instead.
In business, if you ask something which is not possible to
your partner, they will say "Yes", but won't do it anyway.
They will probably even do it and suffer the loss... Do
I have to tell that you won't see this partner again?
One more example, there was a survey conducted by a Western
academic researcher in China. The question was -- "Do you go
to a .... church emple?", with Buddhist, Catholic, Taoist,
etc. as choices. The result showed error because when they
added the number of Christians, Buddhists, Confucians, and
Taoists together, the total number was three times larger
than the sample size! This was because Chinese are
spiritual, and ones who visit churches emples will visit
more than one of them, the researcher's assumption that a
Buddhist will go only to Buddhist temple, etc. could not
apply here. If the question had just asked, "What is your
religion?", the result would be more accurate.
(Moreover... if we said we didn't go to such a good place,
it'd make us look bad. So sometimes we lie. Problem with
that? ;-)
About the Author
Nucha Aquino is a Work-At-Home-Mom who loves to travel.
She currently teaches International Business and Management
in a Graduate School in Laguna, Philippines. When the baby
is asleep and there is no class, she writes about her
International experiences and publishes 2 ezines:
Small-World Ezine at http://small-world.netfirms.com , and
eLaguna's eBiz Tips at http://eLaguna.net/newsletter.htm
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